Skip to main content

tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  February 4, 2015 11:00pm-11:32pm PST

11:00 pm
>> from comedy central's world new headquarters in new york this is the "daily show" with jon stewart. ( cheers and captioning sponsored by comedy central applause ) >> jon: hey welcome to the "daily show." my name is jon stewart. my guest tonight, we're very excited my guest tonight a very impressive young man, wes moore, author of a book called "the work: my search for a life that matters." very excited to have him on the program tonight. but first, if i may, the
11:01 pm
114th united states congress is one month old-- one month! has the new republican control changed the way congress does business? the recipe for making legislative sausage as it were? we examine it in our new segment-- really? ( laughter ) ( applause ) can we just-- i'm sorry can we just-- if we could just do something slightly-- ( laughter ) do we have another segment that i could-- ( laughter ) ( applause ) i'm okay with the first one. now, let's get one thing
11:02 pm
straight. this isn't a lame gritd locked one 13th congress. just ask senate majority leader mitch mcconnell. >> we need to open up-- open up the legislative process in a way that allows more amendments from both sides. sometimes it will be meaning-- mean work late, but restoring the senate is the right thing to do. >> jon: yup. ( laughter ) sure. working late. easy for you to say mitch mcconnell. you carry your house around on your back. so you don't even need to go home. ( laughter ) because i believe-- and i'm being completely serious right now-- senate majority leader mitchell mcconnell is a turtle. ( laughter ) what species? i cannot say. although his native habitat being kentucky my guess is the highest ranking republican senator is an eastern box
11:03 pm
tunnel a common musk turtle or-- i think perhaps this most likely-- a river cooter. if the sixth term seeing your senator from kentucky would like to provide evidence to refute this charge your move! your slow, deliberate move. perhaps you will allow me to sweeten the deal. ( laughter ) ( cheers and applause ) i think arby's just went whew. but the point is mcconnell, in contrast to former majority leader harry reid is allowing senators to propose whatever amendments they want to legislation. his first order of business was the keystone pipeline. i can only assume to be used as a mode of transportation in his attempt to-- as seen here-- catch super mario, utilizing
11:04 pm
some kind of-- ( laughter ) ( applause ) i look-- i look forward to the new amendment policy bringing swift and effective legislative dividends. >> it is an extremely simple amendment. >> the effective language is only eight words, "climate change is real and not a hoax." >> that climate change is real and that human activity significantly contributes to climate change. >> republican senator john hoeven from north dakota. >> you then put one in that says the same thing but taking the word "significantly" out. why did you want the word "significantly" taken out of there? >> because look, it was about finding that balance that will bring bipartisan support to the bill. ( laughter ) >> jon: if take out the word "significantly" was a way to bring republicans on board why not draft the amendment human activity contributed to
11:05 pm
climate change. remember ronald reagan. the wasn't he great. three choors for the death penalty. that's the senate where it's all passive aggressive i'll change one word. for open unadultated aggression. you have to drop by the house on the committee debate on the 9,000th vote to repeal obama care. >> had the administration worked with the governors we might be talking about an entirely-- >> had the administration worked with the governors. had the governors worked with the administration we might not number this position i don't know about your state which i think is a crazy state to begin, that and i mean that just as i said it. ( laughter ) ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: hastings just straight up messed with texas. ( laughter ) that's the one thing texas warns everyone not to do. where's this ballsy young man
11:06 pm
from, anyway? >> the gentleman from florida is recognized. >> i thank you very much. ( laughter ) >> jon: you're from florida. you're from florida and you're calling texas crazy? ( laughter ) might as well call out oklahoma for also having a panhandle. hey, oklahoma nice panhandle sticking out of your state. why don't you grab hold of your ugly panhandle and make me some pancakes you ( bleep ). you're from florida. you can't call other states crazy. that kind of fragrant texas messing is not going to go unremarked upon. >> you made an ininflamm inflammatory statement about myinate and i will not stand here and listen to it. >> jon: we are run by children. let's all calm down. i'm sure congressman hastings,
11:07 pm
he realizes he went a little too far. let's give him a chance to apologize to the good sir from texas. >> well, fine. then you don't have to listen. you can leave if you choose. i told you what i think about texas. i wouldn't live there for all the tea in china. ( laughter ) ( cheers ) >> jon: he's crushing this dude. he doubled down. you don't have to listen. you still come from a crazy state. although, i don't really understand the "all the tea in china" references. i don't see how that's a positive. that seems more like a burden. that's a lot of tea. i don't even know where you keep that much tea. really, you get that much tea you're probably going to get crushed by a billion tea bags. it's not-- not. two solid slams against texas.
11:08 pm
now if hastings wants to maintain a professional relationship here i do think out of protocol, out of prospect, perhaps it's time for him to start walking this back. >> two attacks tossed my way. that's parse and parcel with territory. but there is no reason at all to impugn the people the governor of the state a state of this country and i will await the gentleman's apology. i yield back. >> you will wait until hell freezes over. ( laughter ) >> jon: ohio! my! god! what! this man, this congressman hastings truly does not give a single ( bleep ). just look at him sitting there casually reading. in fact, can we-- can we zoom in
11:09 pm
on what he's reading? no ( bleep )! what's that sub article? "are you giving too many ( bleep )." wow, wow. some prettyularsh words there. what if it doesn't end. what if congressman hastings just fired the first shot in what will soon become an all-out florida-texas conflagration. texas first sends over some rangers on horseback. florida anticipates the move, sending out sex spring breakers to distract them. meanwhile, one man florida wrecking crew george zimmerman is parachuted deep into texas territory. but before zimmerman can stand his ground he is taken out by leather face, texas chainsaw style. then florida retaliates by sending out an elite squadron on alligators high on the bath salts.
11:10 pm
immediately neutralized by a texas-released lethal cocktail of crude oil, mesquite, barbecue sauce, and chuck ( bleep ) morris. and then when the ( bleep ) about you get really ugly, you play each energy football and everybody has a tailgate party and forget about the war. hook them gator form. which is really a shame. you know who would have won a florida-texas war? the rest of the country. ( cheers and applause ) ( laughter ) [car revving] [car revving] ♪ ♪ [car revving] introducing the first ever 306 horsepower
11:11 pm
lexus rc coupe. once driven, there's no going back. ♪ ♪ when you feel good no one is immune. with antioxidants, electrolytes, and b vitamins plus more vitamin c than ten oranges. emergen-c transforms more than just water. emergen-c. let your awesome out. ♪ keep your spirits high... the calories low... and the bill? even lower. new cedar grilled lemon chicken with quinoa, just $9.99. the pub diet only at applebee's. hi, i'm kim. each month millions of gigs of unused data are taken back by wireless companies. tragic. data you paid for, that can be used to see...
11:12 pm
my make-up... my back-hand... my outfits... my vacations... and my outfits. sadly all lost. please. help save the data. new trident unwrapped is the gum you love without a wrapper. welcome to the easy life. ♪ trident unwrapped. super useful. helps fight cavities.
11:13 pm
( cheers and applause ) welcome back. as we've seen our current congress the 114th is a pig lagoon of animosity and cynicism. luckily, there's some new blood in town with convictions as yet unspoiled by washington. freshman senator thom tillis whose message to north carolina voters has always been clear. >> tillis say free-market conservative. >> a conservative businessman who cut red tape to create good-paying jobs. >> we need to reduce regulation. the over-reach is stroig our opportunities. government needs to get out of the way. >> jon: getting to the point where a man can't even open a car wash, cafe or leaf-covered pit with spikes at the bottom of it or a tattoo
11:14 pm
baby parlor. ( laughter ) damn you government! , of course, a lot of politicians spout this free market ideology when it serves their purpose. it's a little harder to do in practice. >> i was having this discussion with-- with someone and we were at a starbucks in my district and we were talking about certain regulations. she said, for example, don't you believe that this regulation that requires this gentleman to wash his hands before he serves your food is important? ( laughter ) >> jon: but you know what? you said free market. you're a free-market guy. you want government out of the way. senator tillis, it's not going to be easy to flop this bedrock principle of modern sanitation regulation but as a free marketeer go ahead. i dare you. >> i said i don't have any problem with starbucks if they choose out to opt out of this
11:15 pm
policy. >> jon: boom! this guy walks the walk! the title of mr. ann rand of 2015 goes to thom tillis. i would high-5 him but i don't want to die like a character in the oregon trail. senator! really? you don't want the guy to have to wash his hands after using the bathroom? maybe you don't recognize the need for basic hygiene standards because you're used to the relatively not vomit-soaked starbucks. you go anywhere else, you'll see our food service is barely hanging on by a thread. >> i watched you pick up raw chicken all night in your hands and then touch cooked foods. >> you don't serve bugs to your customers. >> get a exprag pick this ( bleep ) thing up! look at me! >> look at the crap in the middle of this bar tonight and they didn't even clean it up. should this place down! >> jon: that's what your local bar looks like when they
11:16 pm
try to follow the rules. if tillis thinks making employees wash hands is too onerous by the government i-- i qaentcan't fault him for sticking to his unregulated guns. >> as long as they post a sign that says we don't require our employees to wash their hands after leaving the restroom, the market will take care of that. ( laughter ) >> jon: you do realize that that's a regulation too, right? ( laughter ) all you did was change this to this. ( laughter ) that's not getting rid of regulation. that just makes you an inconsistent ideologue with a light fecal dusting in your latte. see, here's the problem. in your truly free market utopian world, the restaurant wouldn't have to tell you if employees' hands are washed or
11:17 pm
not. and by the time the market figured out which which establishment vente pumpkin spice came with the turd-i-ccino-- that's copywrited-- it really wouldn't matter because we would be far more concerned with the free-market price spike in cholera medicine. you know this all reminds me of kind of a wonderful bedtime story my bubby used to tell me, my grandmother. she used to say, "there was a woman jonathan who had typhoid. her name was mary. she was a cook and because she had typhoid and didn't wash her hands she killed everyone." ( laughter ) "good night, sweet pea."
11:18 pm
so listen senator-- listen senator dung hands von fecal fingers you think we could do a better job of enforcing regulations or streamlining regulations or creating regulations that make sense and aren't onerous? i couldn't gree more. but employees must de. poop before serving food to the public and most of the rules like that didn't come up because government is onerous or in the pocket of big soft soap. don't pretend we don't need any of them. trust me-- if this lady is making your morning roast, you want her to wash her
11:19 pm
i've been called a control freak... i like to think of myself as more of a control... enthusiast. mmm, a perfect 177-degrees. and that's why this road warrior rents from national. i can bypass the counter and go straight to my car. and i don't have to talk to any humans, unless i want to. and i don't. and national lets me choose any car in the aisle. control. it's so, what's the word?... sexy. go national. go like a pro. ♪ "for the love of money"♪
11:20 pm
[richard] shhhh. do you hear that? it's your money. saaaaaaaarah. it's refund season and nobody gets more of your money back than block-guaranteed. get your billions back america. hey. these are good. what have you been feeding us all these years? kfc popcorn nuggets. 100% white meat,
11:21 pm
extra crispy, and made from the world's best chicken. try our kfc bucket and popcorn nuggets meal. these don't even come with a toy and i don't care. ♪ reliability, is now an american
11:22 pm
thing. introducing the all new chrysler 200 america's import. ♪ ( cheers and applause ) > jon: welcome back. my guest tonight, bestselling author. his new book is called "the work: my search for a life that matters." please welcome to the program wes moore. sir. ( cheers and applause ) wes moore! so nice to see you again. how are you? >> i am doing great. i'm doing great, thank you. >> jon: i've known this gentleman for a few years. we've done some work together.
11:23 pm
he is one of the most-- if i may say so-- annoying people. you're so accomplished at such a young age, that it angers me. ( laughter ) >> it angers me, too actually. >> jon: stop it! the book is called "the work: my search for a life that matters." you've served in iraq and afghanistan. you've been in the state department. you've written your second book. what are you now, 28, 32 something like that? >> 36. yeah. >> jon: what-- what gives you that drive? what-- what is it that you found in your life that causes you to have this drive? >> well, you know, i think part of it is my childhood. i had a difficult childhood where i came up in troubled communities. i watched my father die when i was four. i first felt handcuffs on my wrist when i was 11 years old. and i remember going through this revolution, and even the time coming back from afghanistan, where i wanted to find what does that mean to be
11:24 pm
successful? what did all that really mean in my own life? and i felt like in this quest and this journey, my understanding, my definition of the work really became where your greatest gifts and your greatest skill sets begin to start overlapping with the world's greatest needs, and then you chose to do something about it. and so part of the reason why i wanted to tell this story and write this book was almost like a real-time exploration of my own life, about what it meant but then also highlighting these other people who i just drew a tremendous amount of inspiration from, about finding what it meant in my own life to be relevant and truly come alive. >> jon: this-- this-- what you are saying strikes me as the key. it is bringing purpose. and i know one of your greatest causes is helping veterans reintigrate, once they're done with the war. and i think this is such the key. so much of our perception of it is oh, let's help them. when really, their entire being is, no, we serve. that's what we do. let us continue to serve somehow.
11:25 pm
and you found a way to integrate that ethos. >> and how do you find your greatness? i think the one thing that all people who are great at what they do, the one thing all of them have in common is they are passionate about what they do. and i remember when i was first leaving the white house and heading back to new york, and i was going to go work in finance, and i remember speaking with a mentor of mine and he said "you're going to go back to the finance." and i was explaining to him why, and not one thing that came out of my mouth was because i was passionate about it. and he said to me, "if you need to go there, go, and do what you need to do. but the moment you feel like you can leave, leave, because every day you're doing what you're not passionate about, you become extraordinarily ordinary." and what that means is for all of us, we need to find that thing that makes us extraordinary, find that thing that gives us our greatness, and then go after it because that's the only way that you'll find that level of fulfillment. >> jon: or even having that desire. but how do you instill that-- and so you grow up in troubled communities.
11:26 pm
you're working with a community of people trying to adjust to coming back. how do you instill that? how do you go into those communities and convince them that that's worth accomplishing and that they can accomplish it, and that they're not sisyphus pushing a stone up a hill only to have it roll back down on them or maybe that that's okay. >> yeah, i think-- i remember my mother told me something once where she said that a person needs to think that you care before they care what you think. and so i think the first thing is you have to show people that your level of sincerity is genuine, and you have as much a vested interest in them as they should have in you. i have been thinking about some of the people we feature and profile in the work. a woman in boston who started a business that worked at an apparel company, and the only people she employs are single women who live in poverty, from the top of the organization to the bottom of the organization, as a tribute to her mother. or a guy named michael hancock who grew up in a really tough environment in denver and whose only definition of success was
11:27 pm
leaving denver -- >> jon: i hear that from a lot of people. it's a wonderful city. >> it's a great city. so michael hancock, whose definition of success was leaving denver, is currently the mayor of denver. he realized that sometimes the thing that you're most afraid of the thing that gives you the most pain is actually the thing you need to run to with all of your might, and that's where you find your joy. >> jon: it's about purpose will you stay for just a little bit? we've got to go. but i want to talk a little bit more about specifically the programs you're working with for veterans and then how to take this to scale because i think that's the next level is how do you scale this and make it? we'll come back. "the work" is on the bookshelves right now. always good to see you. such a nice man. wes moore, get the book now.
11:28 pm
♪ your favorite taco bell treat... now a coffee. we'll give you a second to drink that in. introducing new cinnabon delights coffee from taco bell. treat yourself. and get four free cinnabon delights with purchase. ♪ coughequence #5. the sleepless night. sorry. robitussin dm max nighttime's dual action liquid instantly soothes your throat and delivers fast, powerful cough relief. robitussin. don't suffer the coughequences. with rollover data, the data you don't use this month rolls over to the next month. and i don't have to do anything? not a thing, mobile share value customers get it automatically. it's how we show appreciation. you know i really appreciate that you appreciate me as a customer. and we appreciate how much you appreciate us appreciating our customers. and i appreciate that you appreciate that.
11:29 pm
and i appreciate you appreciating that. i appreciate that. aaaahhhh. introducing at&t rollover data. the data you don't use rolls over to the next month. all on the network with the nation's strongest lte signal. we love... love... love... chocolaty, creamy... with a little something extra. mmm deliciousness. cookies or almonds. yumminess. hershey's is mine, yours, our chocolate. [ male announcer ] dogs smile longer when you give them dentastix. the treat that's clinically proven to reduce tartar buildup. and now there's dentastix deep clean which encourages chewing. keeping dogs -- and their mouths -- happier even longer. smile! it's dentastix time. ♪ ♪ around the world around the clock.
11:30 pm
in defense of all we hold dear back home. america's navy. you wouldn't do half of your daily routine. so why treat your mouth any differently. brushing alone does less than half the job leaving behind millions of germs. complete the job with listerine®. kill up to 99 percent of germs. and prevent plaque, early gum disease and bad breath. complete the job with listerine®. power to your mouth™. also try listerine® floss. its advanced technology removes more plaque. vo: 85 percent of people who travel will go someplace they've already been. where's the fun in that? it's time to find someplace new. book the hotel you want with the flight you want and we'll find the savings to get you there.
11:31 pm
( cheers and applause ). >> jon: that's our show. here it is your moment of zen. ♪ you've said things about my texas that just were not kind. ♪ any if i get a chance i'll open up a cowboy boot shop in your behind comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh >> tonight it's black history month. to celebrate i got you a show with five black men on the panel. it should have been six but one was ran over. we are talking about black fathers. nobody cares about you no african priests. so climb down off the poll, america. we're going to talk through our daddy issues. let's


info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on